Cringe Corner: AudioWave Dasher

Windows Movie Maker is a surefire way to know you're in for a ride.

In the five years of this fandom's existence, we have seen many musicians come and go. Some have been outstanding and left a lasting impression, while others have left people scratching their heads wondering, "just what in the hell were these people thinking?" - What would a Cringe Corner article be without another one of the latter artists, who goes by the name of AudioWave Dasher?
I first got wind of this guy when he was bitching on some Spybook Facebook group, over how he tried submitting his song into Equestria Daily, and that he was rejected. Without listening to the song itself at first, I figured it had to have been for reason that EQD does get a lot of fan-submissions daily, and for them to sift through that stuff on a daily basis can't be easy, and his work was just brushed aside. After personally hanging out with a few of the EQD guys at BABscon, I learned a few things about how they operate their site, such as their reliance on things like automatic post timer queues for most of their filler articles, and the scores of fan submitted content that gets placed in said queue, with the exception of time sensitive data. I would soon learn just how wrong I was, in assuming that his stuff was brushed aside amongst all the rest. It was flat out rejected. "How could this be?" someone might ask. Well, let's take a look at his work below.

The video starts out innocently enough, with a decent looking, albeit long animation of cute horses being cute. This promptly cuts to 30 seconds worth of really drawn out titles, from "20% Cooler Productions" and other things that just scream originality. Finally, the song itself starts around 40 seconds in, after which I was greeted with some awfully familiar sounding chord progressions and barely audible, garbled attempts at singing. The vocals sounded like a mixture of tone-deafness set to two tracks that were "pushed" to both the left and right sides, with a lot of reverb. It was garbled so much, that in order to follow along, I had to read the lyrics to get the general idea of what the song was about.

Top Notch Lyrics.

Things were about to take a turn for the worse, when the chorus started, bringing along with it some horribly compressed distortion effects. It's almost as if the guitar distortion was recorded, and put through another distortion track, and repeated again. So, about 3 layers of autism distortion, all compressed together into one track.

Alone, this type of thing wouldn't be very noteworthy. It's one thing to make bad music in the beginning and then improve later on. In this case, that hasn't happened, with many other instances of completely off key singing, and the same kind of lyric structures and time signatures - and AudioWave Dasher claims he has over 20 years experience making music. But it's quite another thing altogether, when he calls upon the group to actively spam all of the emails associated with Equestria Daily, in order to get his music pushed in. Because we all know just how effective spamming and harassment are to get your message across, right?

"Please help me to get Senpai-sama to notice me!"

Did someone order a plate of "My Shit Don't Stank"?

"There's no way in hell my music is terrible!" - naïvety at its finest.

While I personally feel bad for the guy, if this is what you have to show after 20 years of making music - I can honestly say with absolute certainty that you're going about this the wrong way. You don't need a $10k studio, all you need is to not be tone-deaf, and not to abuse the ever loving shit out of compression or SOUNDGOODIZER. And you certainly need not try to get a bunch of people to spam another site with emails just so you can push around your music. "I will badmouth them in a positive way, until I get what I want." - please.

"A lot of people use the same power-chord progressions! What are you, a tone-deaf pleb?"

Anyone who has ever owned a Youtube channel learns right off the bat, that it's pointless to argue in the comments section of it. That lesson, among other things, was clearly never learned.
While I can understand, even sympathize with the fact that a lot of the fandom's music is mostly electronic based, and that not many nowadays are willing to pick up a guitar/bass/drums/what have you, that doesn't mean that if you were to do so, you're automatically the next prodigy behind those instruments. You don't need a bunch of compression or a $10k studio to make good sounding music.