It was a story we've known about for a few days, but were too busy posting Comic Drama to pay too much attention to. Now that Horse News has finally come out of our Thanksgiving Food Comas, we bring this to you; a science experiment gone terribly wrong. The image you see above you is real. It features Rainbow Dash congealed in a mysterious brown substance in a glass jar.
That substance, is human semen.
For quite some time now, the "Pony Cum Jar Project" has been going down in the shadows, with one anonymous man collecting all of his ejaculations in a jar, containing a Rainbow Dash toy. This week, the man was horrified to find that the jar, which had been stored too close to a heat radiator, had evidently caramelized the glucose in his semen. The resulting stench was reportedly too unbarable to continue the "project".
The OP of the thread from Thanksgiving day says that he "nearly vomited" when attempting to retrieve the specimen. The renowned scientific authority observes that the toy was basically "boiled in cum" by the heat of the radiator. How the man plans on continuing with his project is uncertain, but he assures followers that he "will not let them down".
To give you an idea how long this project has been going on, here are some earlier photos.
Nice to know the man in charge is also a dedicated Dr. Who fan.
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This makes little sense. Ejaculate is a suspension, if it sits long enough the semen will float to the bottom leaving a relatively clear liquid. Yet in these pictures it appears quite cloudy.
ReplyDeleteHave you never seen the 4chan semen bottle guy? he's the authority on what jizz looks like over time
Deletebut also, this semen was boiled, meaning it was all in-motion due to heat
dont forget that jesus isnt real.
DeleteNeither is abraham lincoln or joseph stalin
DeleteHoly shit, that is vile.
ReplyDeleteNever change, /mlp/.
I fucking love you guys (no homo) but christ, this is too much.
ReplyDeleteNow excuse me while I take a chlorine shower.
>so insecure he has to put "no homo" in there
DeleteGet a load of this faggot!
*internet
DeleteHe needs to get a whopping fat arts grant so he can continue his art and have it properly exhibited and curated in the greatest of today's modern art museums. His Daliesque, Thorneycroftian approach to popular culture speaks of its fecundity; his semen, the vehicle for the conception and exponential growth of humanity, combined with Rainbow Dash, an "icon nouveau" of ambition and devotion for society's multiplicity of generations, from days-old infants to plus-centenarians, meld in vitro to illustrate the raw power of celebrity to captivate the proletariat and spread its influence, spawning memetically, just as spermatozoa and ova seek each other and unite to exert dominion over the cycles of life and nature.
ReplyDeleteOr he needs a shrink and meds, because that is fucking gross and colossally stupid.
>Or he needs a shrink and meds, because that is fucking gross and colossally stupid.
DeleteSo...
Like any other student that goes to preppy art school. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ
Okay.
Oh, come on, now. Dance Compagnie Marie-Chouinard is one hundred million million million million million million million times more profound and entertaining (in an admittedly WTFLOL way) than some dopey guy wanking into a jar and letting it cook.
DeleteI tried to find the one where a bunch of art students pray to a jar of mayonnaise or something and then bathe in it to be more close to home, but alas.
DeleteAnd yet all I can think is that somebody must have really been bored out of their mind.
ReplyDeleteI am at a loss for words, because my mouth is full of vomit..... Thank you, Cap...
ReplyDeleteI | I i
DeleteI I| I _
Is that loss?
DeletePiss Christ anyone?
ReplyDeleteThank you for mentioning this anon
DeleteThis is what happens when we spend too much time in hiatus.
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ReplyDeleteI know of an artist who collected his own semen and displayed it in a gallery on the lower east side of Manhattan about 2 years ago. Might this be the same artist? Mr. R.D., is this you behind this project?
ReplyDeletewhy can someone tell me why he did this in the first place
ReplyDeleteBRAVO LARSON
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This is terrible. OP has it all wrong. He came OUTSIDE Rainbow Dash, and not just once but over and over and over again. How could he have gotten it so wrong?
ReplyDeleteNot the grossest thing I've ever seen anyone do by a long shot.
ReplyDeleteThere is a thing that is sometimes done by members of a certain gender-based ideology. I've seen photos of women trying to keep their period effluence in a jar. I've seen photos of using the effluence in baking food that was intended for human consumption, using it to paint a photo, "freebleeding" (refusing to wear any kind of tampon to keep the mess contained and approaching sanitary), shoving a ball of yarn up their and yanking it out slowly as they knit something with it, and more besides.
Compared to all that, this particular bout of curious idiocy seems very minor. At least it isn't a bodily waste product.
HE CAME IN A JAR
DeleteIn the words of white girls everywhere, "I can't even ...!"
ReplyDelete"Nice to know the man in charge is also a dedicated Dr. Who fan."
ReplyDeleteIs that a hint for his next project? Will he attempt to entertain fellow Whovians with a sonic screwdriver that also doubles as a dildo? I don't even want to think this one through...
Beats the cum and blood in blender modern "art" i saw in a modern art exhibition.
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ReplyDeleteHe needs a large arts grant to continue his art and have it properly shown and curated in the best modern art museums today. His Daliesque, Thorneycroftian approach to popular culture speaks of its fecundity; his sperm, the vehicle for human conception and exponential growth, melds in vitro with Rainbow Dash, a "icon nouveau" of ambition and devotion for society's multiplicity of generations, from days-old infants to plus-centennials, to demonstrate the raw power of celebrity to captivate the proletariat and spread its influence, memetically, just as spermatozoa Continue your fantastic effort! I'm excited to see more interesting things.
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A terrible turn occurred for the "Jar Project," which was hailed as a significant scientific endeavor. The goal of the experiment was to investigate closed ecological systems by observing self-sustaining life in jars containing different environments. Regrettably, unanticipated issues emerged, resulting in ecological disequilibrium, swift degradation, and, in certain instances, the enclosure ecosystems' collapse. The project's lofty objectives were eclipsed by unexpected outcomes and moral dilemmas. The delicate equilibrium found in ecosystems and the unpredictability of scientific research are both highlighted in this cautionary tale. The "Jar Project" is a sobering reminder that scientific endeavors require serious thought and ethical examination.
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