Spring Babby Cup Group Draw

So soon? Indeed! The 4CC had the unfortunate circumstance of playing during the Winter Olympics for its elite cup, and with the FIFA World Cup happening in June/July and other football events preceding it, they've taken the quick option to run their Babby Cup throughout April to avoid any >not virtual sports competition. Last Saturday, DrBorisG drew the teams for the Group Stage; check it out below!

I swear I have seen this somewhere before.

In a group of rematches, some hardcore S&M whips back for the /s/ and /m/ replay. In Winter, the super-wide robots were thrashed by the big-hipped ladies, and both teams were put to shame by wrestlers and ponies alike. The /m/ Council are doing tweaks and fine-tunes to prep themselves for taking this cup by storm. Expect /s/ to take it all by the way; they're sticking to their strategy and holding their silicon chests fast.

I have a reason to post Duane now. Yay. 

Manager Amis's confidence is through the roof. When asked about his rematch with some NICE robots and the battle with less-than-lewd animu grills, he responded with a thorough;

"Uuuuuhhhh" - Amis, 2014

Inspirational.

/jp/ and /m/ have a bit of, eheh, history. With "Doogay" migrated to /lgbt/, SuppahTenko's solid team is poised to stomp all over their robot rivals and not-so-sexual little sisters. Not much hype from /e/, other than advancing from the Autumn Qualifiers on a 3rd-place ruling. Best of luck to them as always.

The real storm is coming from /wsg/. With the transition to PES 14, a number of good teams went foul (see /m/) and others went elite. The latter is most certainly /wsg/. While they were the butt-end of the cup's jokes for a small while after not advancing from Autumn's Qualifiers, their performance in the 2014 Winter Friendlies turned all heads. With a 1-0 win against now-champions /trv/ and a 4-2 stomping of Top 8 finisher /f/, RollFizz stands as a dark horse of the cup. 

Advancement Prediction: /s/ and /wsg/

 A group of profilic heart and a good degree of fans, there's a lot at stake and a lot to prove in this group. 3rd place Autumn 2013 /hr/ was unable to repeat that success in Winter, and /vr/ ran out of quarters in a group with powerhouses /wg/, /ck/, and champion /trv/. They've shown a bit of petering out since their Provisional days, so don't expect far too much from them. /tv/ shares a similar story of woe; the Babby Bronze and Silver medalists have secured their place in a perpetual yo-yo, and Cemedygeld hopes to break this curse, starting with reminding Emma and Kacho who the real human beings are in this competition. For you.

Did someone say dubs? No? Hah, top kek. DoubleNigger's legion of funshooters is boosted this time around with the addition of a Silver Medal strikes, [s4s]-tan. They were the top Fifth Founding "Provisional" team in the Autumn Qualifiers, but /pol/'s inability to catch a seagull shot them right back to Fetus. In this group of fallen heroes, they can only hope. Then there's that team...

"Like I said in the Daily Drift, both me and Kraus are mildly optimistic of our chances. Also dat [s4s] replay," - MayDave, /o/

/o/bligatory IT'S /O/'S YEAR BABY! WOOO! WAT RACING TO THE FINISH LINE! DRIFTING THROUGH KEKS AND SPEEDING DOWN THE CHANNEL LANES! WHO THE FUCK IS A /VR/ ANYWAY? LAST TIME I LOOKED AT A WOMAN SHE WAS GONE WHEN I BLINKED! 

Advancement Prediction: /o/ and [s4s]

 Oh dear. Of all the fucking teams...

/b/ returns to its Babby homestead height abuse-free and with a fresh set of faces. Their head man Cosa Nostra has been playing with his version of Blender, so expect Giga Puddi to look simply delicious. A lot of tinkering has been done on /b/'s end; Cosa expects to troll his way back to the Elite Cup to bother /a/ and /v/ once more. They've had a strong showing so far, only set back by an pair of elite feet and a zoo, and are shaping up to be a real contender in the cups to come.

Legbutt. Once the unstoppable gay prodigy, now dishonored in the elites. For a time, it looked iffy for them when Trannier Than Thou let it go and departed, but old /jp/ manager and expert rigger Doogie (now Doogay) picked up the team before reviving TTT and arming his twinks for battle. They've been horrendous so far, with offsides and chokes keeping them from even a draw so far. I still hold a special place for them in my heart, and you should too. These gays are flaming, and are burning to get that glory back.

/fa/ has a manager by the name of Foojile. He does not post in the thread often, nor is he active on the IRC chat. Apparently he and /pol/ manager/ex-/fa/ manager KHS Rowan talk a bunch, but apples are not keen to fall far from their trees if that's the case, export-wise. Expect a poor showing, if one at all.

/out/. That board you always link to hasn't a whole lot to speak for itself. With a funky roster and a half-alive manager in the form of /out/back Jack, it's hard to really put a mark on where they're gonna go. A halfway-decent run in Autumn Fetus speaks a shade, but they didn't advance. However their formations could work wonders in PES 14. #WildCard

"Expect big things," - Gayman Alpha, /hm/

/hm/ have been dead for nearly all of 2013. Their manager, Gayman Alpha, joined a touch too late to compete in Autumn 2013, and has spent the last six months rebuilding Falcon71's monument to Full Homo. They've got a win and a loss in the Winter Friendly season under this management, and even though he's got a large mouth and moans on stream, the validity of Gman's men has yet to be proven. Regardless, a win against a tough /y/ and a shade of press with Bearforce's legbutt run has built quite the hype train for the small team. It is worth nothing that the star of the team has yet to score, and lost his captaincy to Ellen DeGeneres, who returns to her position as the unbridled Queen.

Advancement Predictions: /b/ and /hm/ (BEARFORCEONELOL)

>implying five defenders isn't the
future of football

In the Group of Gay Part 2 a casualty of the Winter Group of Death, /y/, stands before a sturdy /n/ and two wily young'uns. It faces another rematch with fellow 2D gay team /cm/, who they beat in the Autumn Round of 16 somewhat handily last year. Besting /co/ and drawing against /toy/ is no small feat, and the Aussie manager Sleep Deprived Anon fabulously stands as one of the mightier forces in this Babby tournament. Home of >gold defender and master of the draw, this member of Team Gay is the one to look out for.

Speaking of Team Gay, Freeman's /cm/, while underwhelming, took the fight to their mainstream older brother in Winter's Group A. They haven't won a match in PES 14 yet, but with Levi-sama and Kaworu leading the charge against a bendable /po/, the malfunctioning tools of /diy/, there may be hope for this team yet. Unless you're talking about /n/. Then hope is dead :^).

Fantasy 4chan Cup Football and tons of post-match stat-tracking on the wiki is done by Vaughan (Mitsu Chan if you use IRC), the /n/ manager. Though he likes trains a hell of a lot more than bikes, this scrappy dog and his collection of modes of transportation has yet to live up to his riggy-diggy predecessor. A mid-tier team nearly defined by that sole quality, big V is hoping I Like Trains can earn him enough easy points with /diy/ and /cm/ before moving on to pick at meaty end-bits of /y/.

Unable to escape the Autumn Qualifiers, there's little to be said about Sargbot and /diy/ing Spic's team. Hopefully the new engine and some new tactics sorts themselves out with at least a positive GD. Here's to you MacGuyver. /po/, no longer under Paper Plane's tutelage, is now helmed by a duo of friends, Soryuu and Sir Baconson. They're untested, as is the team in 14, and are in the same boat as /diy/. A lot in the air for these teams, looking more and more like tissue than cardboard.

Advancement Predictions: /y/ and /cm/

The Trash. The Flush. The Shit Player. The Flash. That red-clad hero is the one reason /co/ is stuck with the mighty /pol/ and /adv/ in this bottom-tier cup. Recent showings have them making it to the Round of 16 only to be bested by the ponis followed by a strong showing in Winter 2014's Group of Death. Despite beating the mighty /toy/, poor matches against 2D porn in the forms of /h/ and /y/ sent them tumbling back down to the Babbies. Regardless, they stand with /s/, /y/, /g/, and /ck/ as favorites to advance, and even take it all. Managers DocSax and Mantis have a ladder to climb back to the top, but with new roster changes and a firmer grip on the game, be on the lookout for /co/'s performance this time around.

There's little to say about /adv/. Clrs's scrappy team has pulled out some amazing performances, but placement in rough groups keeps them from showing their true potential. S/adv/irgin is still a goal monster, making this group is a three-horse race between the top-three teams in it.

Be afraid

>Rowan. Now that that's out of the way, 2014's /pol/ should have performed in Winter, but due to some internet issues, their once /fa/shionable manager and Silver Medalist of Autumn KHS Rowan let the big team down. He's back with new co-managers Machine and AWyattMann, and the mighty Stormfront seeks to bear down on the plebian cartoon, literate, emphatic, and gun-happy races he faces. They're a favorite to win it all, but they've yet to perform in the new engine. Will they live up to the hype?

/lit/ and /k/ are bad. Plenty of heart comes from intellectualist San Marino, and the skill of merc manager Desert Eagle speaks for itself, but the Babby-friendly Lolita and once-champion Zergface are now seen with disdain and doubt. Regardless, a fe
w surprises may come from /k/ yet. It's as the old saying goes; if you sleep on the floor, you can't fall out of bed.

Advancement Predictions: /co/ and /pol/

This group is shit. Other than yo-yo /g/ from Vapor32BIT and a not-silly tactics /gd/ brought to you by Smear, every team has a horrendous record. /ic/ manager OrangeAndBlack, however, is looking the strongest of the bottom three, and may pop a few surprises by getting easy points from R3APER's /3/ and El Negrito's /r9k/.

Nice kits R3APER

/g/, much like /adv/, have been put in rough group after rough group in the Elite theater, and as such have come out a better team. I'm sure they're at least to make the Top 8, and with enough luck, we'll all be installing Gentoo when the flowers start blooming.

Put every player in a vertical line. Literally, every player. When M3OW helmed the artistic team of 

/gd/, that was their go-to tactic (and it worked). With some odd plays happening behind the scenes, he was sacked and now Smear looks to regain the Fifth Founding team's status as "Top Provisional". 

/r9k/ and /3/ once almost won Babby Cups, and the 2nd-place curse looks alive and hungry in them now. After being unable to advance/getting fetus'd from Autumn, the two have little to speak for themselves. Here's hoping there's as few 0-0 thrillers in this group of misfits.

Advancement Predictions: /g/ and /ic/

This Group of Death features three of the Summer 2013 sob story, which put both /tg/ and /fit/ in Autumn and took their elite status away (thanks Retortelement). Headlining this group is stronk /ck/, who have bounced back from troubled times and, save a last-minute goal from a /wg/ defender, had an excellent presence in Winter 2014. They're the favorites overall to take the cup home this Spring, and manager Antacid Canada looks to expel the pressure forward to Summer.

/int/ sucked in Winter. They was plain bad. A lack of comprehension of the new game could have a part on it, but ever since Summer 2012, /int/ has been on a slow decline, much like /m/. Though their manager Impeaching could get their team on track, that second place spot is looking more and more like it belongs to THE EMPRAH.

They're gonna make it. They're all
gonna make it.

The DM is the Cup's longest-serving manager. Through thrashed invitationals and losing his golden team's elite status, he has stuck with his boyz and Orkz. Winner of Best Fans for every cup (every cup), /tg/ further proves themselves the best board, especially when pitted against such strong opponents.
Expect them to blast the competition away with their mighty shoulder guards and for this cup to be under the command FOR THE EMPRAH.

A year ago, /d/ almost won this cup. However, a purple Bob Sapp and a rag-tag team of hooved opponents stopped them in the Round of 16. Since then, manager Chance has been unable to reclaim their old glory, and should consider himself lucky to advance from this group of titans.

Weasel. The ex-/an/ manager, with the great assistance of Rehmix, helped bring the only Durgen team back to the Top 16 of the Elite stage. Now the otter-mode tyke helms an old favorite of the cup, the mighty /fit/. Unmanaged for the longest time, /fit/ has been unable to produce a strong presence since Winter 2013. Regardless, they stand as the underdog of this group, and with new blood in Johnny Rambles along with strength in PES14 showing with a /ck/ tie and a win against /hm/  all the while rigged to all hell, things are looking bright for the strongmen. Besides, at the end of the day, we all strive to be real /fit/izens.

Advancement Predictions: /ck/ and /tg/

Jesus fuck every manager in this group is crying their eyes out (except for /u/, bby). Nicknamed "Group Pessimism", a number of some of the laughing stocks of the cup gather to vie for those two slots in Summer. Looking strong is /c/, now managed by ex-mulp manager Norml. His affluence with Tomoko will do him little, for the feeble group of girls have a mountain to climb and a rival to smash before even thinking about summer holidays.


/u/ is looking the most ship-shape of the five, with manager Retortelement saying little about his purest team of soccer. Given the chance to perform last Summer, they thrashed their group, but a repeat showing was cancelled come Winter. It's great to see a once-terrible team come into their own, but the future is foggy for /u/.

Arm Abuse is real. That Trumpet though...

Honestly, Aitor Karanka and Powdinet like to cry about their teams' peformance, but /sci/ and /vp/ also look great. Fresh kits and a great showing last Autumn spruce up some weird science for Spring, and Powdi has been hard at work in Blender to bring the Pokemen to life, even if >Lord Helix is a shit idea for a player. A reminder that /vp/ were the top-performing team in the 2014 Winter Friendlies, and even though Friendlies don't count for shit, it gives the notorious team some standing ground and a bit of bragging rights on the football field. 

/vg/ will lose.

Our esteemed reporters were able to get some input on this underwhelming-looking group;

"I don't know, I haven't thought about it" - Powdinet, /vp/ 

"I'm gonna wreck it," - Norml, /c/ 

"I better get get the lube ready for my soft butthole," - DeMessi, /vg/ 

"Honestly, i don't know what the hell to expect since we're all going in expecting to lose," - Aitor Karanka, /sci/

Advancement Predictions: /sci/ and /vp/


With this cup containing an unprecedented 40 teams, other managers of higher-caliber teams shared their input in great enthusiasm for the competition;

"Lol what's a babby cup I manage /sp/" - EdgarBub, 2014
"Why the hell aren't we in this cup," - Bro-Ker, /biz/
"Sack Gracen or we riot," - Anonymous, 2014
"Probably the hypest Babby Cup ever," - UselessNepgear, 2014

To sign off, here's a trailer by Horse News' own Vedrim to tide over your hype for this Friday. The cup kicks off at 12pm EST at twitch.tv/the4chancup, get hype!