You could have prevented this

Called the cops, called the Fire Department, called pizza hut, called the USN, called the Royal Navy, called the Red Army, called the FBI. called the CIA, called Interpol, called the KGB, called the USMC, called the USAF, called the Royal Air force, called MI 6, called Scotland Yard, called the US National Guard of every state, called NYPD, called Obama, called the Queen, called Putin, called David Cameron, called every Governor of every US State, used my time phone to call Winston Church hill, As well as Hitler, Stalin, Theodore Roosevelt, George Washington, Montezuma, ever Caesar, and Gilgamesh, called US Army, called British Army in every era, called every phone sexline, called papa john’s, called the US Coast Guard, called my State Senators, called my Senators, called every republican in the US, called Dr. Who, called the Pope, called my local Gang lords, called the State Patrol of ever state west of the Mississippi, called all of my local news channels, called Star Fleet, called The Sun, called The national enquirer, called CNN, called Scot Pelly, called Steven Colbert, called half of the Mexican Drug Cartels, called Nintendo, called the Japan Maritime Self-Defense Force, called the head of the Illuminati, called ever free mason, called bilderberg, called my neighbors, called the mayor of ever city in France, called my mom, called the Emperor of Man, and called every school district in Canada, called Ghostbusters, told the dog, hid under the bed, hugged my waifu goodbye.